No one believes me, but . . .

I did pay attention during bible study. I just doodled all over my paper while I was listening. At first I was making an effort to take notes on what Chris (the guy who leads it) was saying, but then I just started doodling in between specific points where he would elaborate more, and never got back to note-taking.

These doodles aren't really anything special, but eh. Figured I'd put 'em up anyway. It's a little weird, because I used to have, like . . . the House Style of Pinky Lillix or something, and now I don't have a set style really . . . so whenever I draw my older characters (like Clox and Bone on the page above), they come out looking drastically different each time. I mean, it's still them. But I haven't gotten to a point yet where I'm like, "THIS IS HOW I'LL DRAW THEM FROM NOW ON."

It keeps changing. And that's okay. My story ideas for these characters keep changing too. But then . . . I'm changing! *cue cheesy anthem about self-discovery*

I've also come to the conclusion that I need to learn how to come up with plots. I focus so much on characters, that there's never much of a story going on. ANYWAY . . .



I know I have a really, really, REALLY long way to go with my cartooning. Especially considering I'm being put to shame by high schoolers who totally kick my ass in this department (fellow deviantArt peeps). Like, it hurts my heart and makes me want to crawl into a box that's floating down a river that's heading towards a waterfall.

But despite that realization, I still get moments where I'm just feelin' it. . . and it's rarely for pictures I've spent a long time on, or put a lot of effort into. Usually for dumb, uninspired doodles like the one above, I just stop for a moment and think, "Damn. I'm good."

And I think it's less about the finished product, and more about the process of the drawing; like the movement of the pen feels so natural and smooth, that it's like I know this is where my heart really lies. Which sounds really frickin' cheesy.

But maybe that's why it's rare I like any finished drawing I have, and favor the doodles; because the doodles were done without worrying about getting every line right, or everything shaded properly. It's like in the course of refining my drawings, something gets lost.

But the doodles themselves are just . . . themselves. It's organic and real, and often it has so much more life to it than anything else I attempt.

I'm not really sure where this ramble is coming from, so I'm going to end it here.

I like doodles. The end.

Love,
Pinky L.